Name: Samson Rosalez

Nickname: Sammy

Age: 15

Profession: Student, nefarious doer of evil and/or unduly harassed innocent (depends on who you ask)

Talents: Seducing girls over homework, horticulture

History: The ill-gotten offspring of an ancient bloodsucker and trailer trash. In a stroke of good fortune, Sammy is being raised by the ancient bloodsucker.

Personality: Short, sarcastic, and opportunistic. Comes from being raised by a cape-wearing vampire named Fernando

Name: Hunter Smith

Age: 16

Profession: Student, Destroyer of All That Stands in the Face of Justice!/Stalker of Vampires

Talents: Tackling, Dramatic Shouting, knitting

History: From a long, proud line of Hunter Smiths, who have passed down their techniques for defeating evil for generations upon generations. Hunter bears the weight of this tradition proudly and, uh... gracefully. He has decided upon Sammy as his Eternal Nemesis without any input from said vampire.

Personality: Overzealous, enthusiastic, and rather physical. Sammy believes there is an argument to be made against his general mental health... and that Hunter's tackling talents would be better put to use on the football team.

Name: Fernando Rosalez

Nickname: Ferdy

Age: Around 275

Occupation: Vampire and Hausfrau extraordinaire

Talents: Seducing the ladyfolk, domestic tasks, and the uncanny ability to locate every box of Ho-Ho's in a twenty mile radius

History: Long, long ago (okay, so not even three hundred years ago), some poor misguided Nightwalker decided that Fernando would make an excellent vampire. Prince of Darkness, he is not, but Ferdy embraced his new lifestyle. In fact, things were going pretty smoothly until fifteen years ago, when one of his former paramours hunted him down and handed over his new progeny. Ferdy has embraced this newest development as enthusiastically as he did his fangs and cape, and is doing his very best to raise his lil' vampling right.

Personality: Melodramatic, earnest, and slightly overbearing in an oddly maternal way. Sammy's just glad his dad can't show up at school during the daytime.

Name: Lady Buffington Prodigal Mayhem

Nickname: Buffy

Age: 3

Occupation: Show circle drop-out/Ferocious Vampire-Slaying Hound

Talents: Terrifying beasts five times her size

History: Mrs. Smith first picked up Buffy from a breeder with dreams of grooming her to be a prize-winning showdog. Unfortunately, her son Hunter hijacked little Buffy and trained her in the mystic ways of canine vampire slayer assistance. Sure, at first, he would have preferred a Rottweiler, but it didn't take him long to bond with his new fluffy friend. These days, she enjoys pampering by day from Mrs. Smith and the excitement of vampire hunting by night.

Personality: Enthusiastic, eager, playful, and willing to sink her teeth into any vampire Hunter tells her to.

Name: Melissa Philomena Smith

Nickname: Missy

Age: 18

Occupation: Brother herder/College Freshman/Customer Service

Talents: Pinpoint accuracy with hand-thrown projectiles, speed-dialing/texting, eerie ability to calculate large numbers and sales tax in her head.

History: Being the eldest child in the Smith family has not been easy, but not having to bear the name Hunter has made it just a little better. While Missy has all the training of the Smith clan, she is quite possibly the world's most skeptical vampire hunter. After a lifetime of looking after her baby brother, she dreamt of the day when she could go to college and be around normal people... until she saw the cost of room and board. So, now she dreams of the day when she has a high-paying job as a CEO where she can laugh maniacally at her slave-monkey underlings... and get out of the house.

Personality: Dangerous, no-nonsense, carries pointy objects and knows how to use them, but perfectly nice and cheerful to her friends.

Name: Josephine May Parker

Nickname: Josie

Age: Last seen at age 21

Occupation: Waitress

Talents: Tracking old boyfriends, bullying bloodsuckers, and dressing with style.

History: Josie's lived in the Happy Meadows Mobile Housing Park with her mother her entire life. When she met a tall, dark, mysterious man while working at the local Waffle House, she secretly dreamed of moving into a little trailer of her own... until Mr. Tall Dark and Commitment-Challenged disappeared into the night. Her life got all the better when she discovered he'd left her a little reminder of their week-long fling. Nine months later, she found out that that little reminder came equipped with a pair of fangs and decided she'd had enough. After staking out the local convenience store every night for weeks, she finally cornered Ferdy and handed Sammy over, and hasn't been heard from since.

Personality: Ornery, pushy, and not the least bit afraid of vampires.

Name: Tracy Jenkins

Age: 15

Occupation: Student

Talents: Looking sweet and innocent, picking out the absolute worst person for homework help.

History: Tracy's one of the fabled "good girls." You know the type: shy little smile, dresses in parentally-approved clothes, spends her weekends nursing sick kittens back to health. All she needed was a little help with her German homework...

Personality: Sweet, innocent, and currently really confused about how boys communicate if they like you or not... and just a tad worried about her recent memory loss.